Let them be bored: The Parenting Revelation That Made a Room Full of Parents Sigh with Relief

I was running a parenting workshop recently, exploring the thorny topic of device usage. As we talked about the ever-present pull of screens, one mum shared her frustration: “They say they’re bored the minute the I ask them to get off their devices.” Another added, “Then they drive you nuts until you give in.”

Then I said something that, judging by the stunned silence, shouldn’t have been profound, but somehow was: “It’s okay for your children to be bored. You don’t have to do anything about that.”

The room went quiet for a beat. And then, slowly, came a collective exhale. It struck me that something so simple had landed so deeply. And I think I know why.

The Pressure to Fill the Gaps

We’re raising children in a world of constant stimulation. Entertainment is on demand. Information is instant. Distraction is just a swipe away. And somewhere along the way, boredom got a bad name. It became something to avoid, fix, or apologise for.

Many of us were raised in homes where downtime meant riding bikes, staring at clouds, or constructing elaborate pillow forts. Now, when our children utter the words “I’m bored,” we often feel a flash of guilt—or panic. Are we meant to step in? Provide a craft kit? Schedule an activity? Hand over a screen?

Here’s the truth: boredom is not a problem. It’s a portal.

Why Boredom Is Good for Kids

While boredom might feel uncomfortable (for us and for them), it plays an essential role in child development. Here’s what boredom offers our kids—when we give it space to unfold:

• Creativity: When there’s no immediate entertainment, the brain starts reaching. That’s when cardboard boxes become castles and couch cushions become boats. Boredom nudges kids toward imagination.

  
  

• Problem-solving: “What can I do?” is a genuine question. And it’s good for kids to have to answer it. Learning to entertain themselves is a lifelong skill.

  
  

• Emotional resilience: Boredom builds tolerance for low-stimulation moments like waiting rooms, long car rides, or sitting still in class. It helps kids learn that not every moment will be fun, and that’s okay.

  
  

• Autonomy: Being bored and working through it teaches kids to rely on their own inner resources, not just external input.

  
  

It might not look impressive. It might involve a lot of lying on the floor and groaning. But trust me, something important is happening under the surface.

When Screens Fill Every Gap

Now, let’s talk about what happens when boredom never gets a chance. In a device-saturated world, it’s easy (and convenient) to hand over a screen. No judgment—we’ve all been there. But when screens fill every quiet space, kids don’t get to practice boredom.

Instead, they get used to constant input. And when that input stops, their tolerance for stillness shrinks. That’s when we hear, “I’m bored,” followed quickly by, “Can I go on my iPad?”

If screens are the automatic answer to boredom, kids never learn to reach inside themselves. And that, over time, makes it harder for them to self-regulate, persist through uninteresting tasks, or manage transitions without a device buffer.

The good news? You don’t need to fight boredom. You just need to stop fearing it.

You Don’t Have to Fix It

Here’s what I told those parents in the workshop—and what I’ll tell you now:

You are not responsible for your child’s entertainment. You don’t need to feel guilty when they’re bored. You can let it be uncomfortable without rushing in.

This doesn’t make you a neglectful parent. It makes you a wise one.

Boredom is a feeling, like hunger or frustration or disappointment. It passes. And each time it does, your child’s capacity grows.

So What Can You Do Instead?

If you'd like to shift your response to boredom, here are some starting points:

1. Acknowledge it without solving it.“Sounds like you’re bored. That can feel pretty uncomfortable sometimes."

   
   

2. Hold space, not solutions. You don’t have to list options or rush in with ideas. Trust that they’ll find something eventually.

   
   

3. Limit immediate screen access.Create device-free times or zones where boredom has room to breathe.

   
   

4. Offer open-ended materials.Keep paper, pencils, blocks, or recycled items on hand. Not as a demand—but as a quiet invitation.

   
   

5. Let them grumble.That moaning stage? It’s part of the process. Don’t take it personally.

   
   

6. Model it.Let them see you sitting with your own stillness sometimes. Not scrolling. Not rushing. Just being.

   
   

A Final Word

I know parenting can feel like a series of urgent tasks. We want our kids to be happy, engaged, and learning. We don’t want them to struggle. But here’s the twist: letting them struggle with boredom is one of the ways we help them grow.

So next time your child says, “I’m bored,” take a breath. Resist the urge to jump in. Offer empathy, not entertainment. And then let them find their own way through it.

You’re not failing them by doing less.

You’re freeing them to become more.